TV review: Made in Chelsea Series 3 episode 1

April 05, 2012 07:43 | Film and TV
Made in Chelsea

If Made in Chelsea left you with a Sloane shaped hole in your stocking last Christmas, then its return to our screens on Monday for a third series of ‘structured reality’, was probably just what you needed.

On the other hand, if like me you feel the show has run its course and should have finished on a high end note after what was a brilliantly entertaining second season, then it is going to take much more than egg cracking therapy, a hand full of newbie’s and a ‘boob party’ at Cafe de Paris, to retain your attention for the foreseeable weeks.
Needless to say, I have been wrong before. Dubious, as were many when the show returned last year for a second series, the arrival of likeable characters such as notorious ‘pardy’ boy Jamie Laing, Topshop heir Chloe Green and artist Oliver Proudlock sparked new interest and viewing figures rocketed.
Unfortunately, interest appears to have exceeded Miss Green’s rather short lived acting career, not to mention her relationship with co-star Ollie Locke. And while Chloe is probably still laying low in Monaco wondering what the hell she was thinking, Ollie proudly re-bounded back onto our screens on Monday night sporting a brand, spanking new Jaguar car.
Certainly not the type to keep a low profile since reaching the faux-celebrity status which cast members are steadily becoming accustomed to, Ollie apparently paid a few Great British pounds to have his new car customised to resemble a sort of St Georges Day float. 
With his trademark wardrobe, antique table and matching fridge, it wasn’t long before Ollie bought a car and vandalised it to the same patriotic effect and if sightings of Katie Price in her pink Range Rover weren’t enough to keep the locals indoors, I fear it won’t be long before residents are witnessing hoards of teenage girls chasing the union jack clad jag along the King's Road. It’s all very sixties.
“You might need another car for like, non-statement driving” said Richard.. who, you are wondering?
Oh that Richard – E4 soon cleared up a small production hic-cup by tweeting: “Shudda been Richard Dinan – sorry random Richard” – all very professional. Luckily I had done my homework.
Co-founder of the Phantom Card, hair rival and good friend of Ollie’s, Richard Dinan made his TV debut on Monday night and Chelsea’s very own Bridget Jones, Cheska could not have looked happier about it – the poor chap. 
Made in Chelsea trended worldwide during the hour-long opening episode and scouring through the hundreds of tweets whilst Freederm Gel acne treatment and Rimmel London filled the ad breaks, the general feeling amongst fans – those aged 14-16 was a good one. 
Also suitably impressed that evening was Caggie as she watched Spencer swoop over White Waltham Airfield, Berkshire flying a G-BZMT aircraft, because in Chelsea it is simply not enough to pilot a 4x4 by the age of 23. 
Much to the fans delight, the pair shared a kiss during the hour-long Christmas special, although it exuded all the passion of an eight year old girl being caught in a game of kissy-cats – eyes wide open. And in the words of Bruno Mars – “Why were they open?” 
Shortly after, Miss Dunlop put a little distance between the two of them; about ten thousand miles to be exact. When she flew to Australia to see in the New Year with co-star Proudlock, she and Spencer did not speak for the entire duration of the trip - “Not for his lack of trying” she later admitted to Hugo over a quiet drink in The Phene.
Call me old fashioned Cagg’s, but it usually helps when one switches on their phone, no? “I guess I didn’t really want to speak to him” she pouted. I guess not. 
And where does this leave ‘Spaggie’ you ask? 
Two weeks after her return to the royal borough, Caggie decided it was time to come clean to Spencer about her festive holiday romance, only to find, Spencer was already well informed of her new Aussie boyfriend Joel, along with the fact that after just four short weeks, she’d had his name tattooed on her arm – a sore blow for the guy who late last year confessed his undying love for her.
Alas, along with a second sinking of the Titanic last weekend, this is one saga we can finally lay to rest. T-shirts will be exhibited on eBay for approximately one week.
In other news, Proudlock took Jamie to church this week. “I’m on my best behaviour” Jamie gloated “I just don’t want to burst into flames when I go in.” HTB as it is known to most, is short for Holy Trinity Brompton, a vibrant Anglican church nestled in the beautiful Onslow Square, renowned for the Alpha Course, an exploration into the meaning of life.
Jamie left church singing “God is greaaat” much to Proudlocks amusement. “It makes you feel good and fresh” the words reeling off his tongue, particularly as new comer Kimberley totted out of church wearing a fur and heels combo. In Chelsea, church just got sexy. 
To round up a rather uneventful first episode..... Gabilicious threw a party, celebratory of the fact she can now wear low cut tops. Francis declared “Smaller boobs for everyone!” Hugo is sickeningly in love with his new girlfriend Natalie who gave him a key to her flat this week. Rosie and Victoria are still sucking lemons. 
Millie landed herself a job this week – well almost. As an intern at Glamour Magazine, the socialite got a taste of what real work entailed, until Cagg’s showed up with a bottle of champagne declaring lunch hour – I give it two weeks. 
Finally, producers found yet another useless spa treatment, perfect for those with no proper day job – Mark Vandelli, Victoria and Gabilicious tried Egg Therapy. I will personally be sticking to the poached variety, served with salmon at the Bluebird Cafe
Next time on Made in Chelsea
After moving in together Jamie and Spencer can’t agree on certain house rules and Hugo’s past meets the present as Millie survives her fist awkward lunch of the series. 
Rachael Grace

Tags: Made in Chelsea, Bluebird, TV review, The Phene


More Stories

  1. University of London Symphony Orchestra

    The Orchestra comes to Kensington

    Kicking off for a new season, The University of London Symphony Orchestra is hosting an exciting programme of Shostakovich, Adams and Bernstein on 23rd November at St. Stephen’s Church in Kensington.Home to one of the leading student orchestras in the...
  2. Smart Turnout

    The Best of British comes to Chelsea

    This month, British brand Smart Turnout launches their pop-up store on the King’s Road. The London-based menswear and accessories label, was founded by Philip Turner in 1999 following his departure from the British Army. In British horse racing each rider...
  3. Mama Browns

    Mama Brown's returns to Chelsea

    Looking for Christmas gift inspiration? Look no further than Mama Brown’s! Based on the Kings Road, London’s largest pop up store is back, bigger and better than ever from November the 25th.Reinventing an old Victorian postal warehouse, guests will be...
  4. Shilo Engelbrecht

    Anthropologie does art

    It's no secret that Anthropologie are experts when it comes to fashion and homeware design, but did you know their creative talents expand to the world of curation?Described as a platform for artists, designers and brands who inspire the label...
  5. Frock Me

    Frock Me! Vintage fashion fair

    A staple on the vintage scene, Frock Me! Vintage Fashion Fair has been the ultimate destination for retro finds since the 1990's. Favoured with models, fashion editors and retro enthusiasts alike, the fair has been attended by everyone from Kate...
  6. Scandinavian Fashion

    Scandi style comes to Chelsea

    Londoners have a lot to thank Scandinavia for: the invention of the zip, flat pack furniture and, of course, the fashion. The byword for minimalist cool, Nordic design is celebrated for its clean-cut lines and sophisticated simplicity. This month, online...
  7. Anthropologie

    Transitional trends on King’s Road

    The arrival of Autumn is all about starting afresh. It's back to work, back to school and time to upgrade your wardrobe for the new season ahead. But what are the trends and how can you make them work for...
  8. Luxury watch

    Time for luxury

    What moves people to spend the money on a luxurious designer watch? If you currently own a nice watch, I mean a really honest-to-goodness nice watch, you already know the answer to that. If you are one of the folks...
  9. Chelsea Book Fair

    Chelsea Antiquarian Book Fair returns

    Held at the beautiful Chelsea Old Town Hall, the Chelsea Antiquarian Book Fair is the go-to destination for literary enthusiasts and antique dealers alike. A firm fixture in the King's Road shopping calendar, this 24-year-old event is a unique opportunity...
  10. Home projector

    Enjoy a home projector

    Home projectors do not play the grainy, flickering images you might remember from years ago. Projectors display high-definition images that can make your home theater unique. Everyone will want to come to your home.MoviesHome projectors can display your favorite movies...
  11. Child online

    Protect your child online

    The internet is a fantastic resource for children, allowing them to complete research, learn new skills and interact with friends. However, the internet also offers the perfect anonymity for predators. Familiarising yourself with online grooming and the dangers it poses...
  12. Reebok Fithub

    Reebok brings FitHub to Chelsea

    Reebok arrive in Chelsea on Saturday 7th June, ready to empower people to live a fit and healthy lifestyle with its first ever FitHub. The Reebok FitHub stores aim to bring the community together via a different, challenging and rewarding...
  13. Kate Kuba shoes

    Harvest unveils shoe lounge by Kate Kuba

    Harvest is excited to unveil its new shoe lounge in partnership with footwear brand, Kate Kuba. Kate Kuba has created a boudoir-style boutique on the lower ground floor at Harvest, offering stylish and beautifully crafted shoes to complement Harvest’s elegant dress...
  14. Candy Kittens

    Budgeting tips for teenagers

    You’ve finally got a job! Whether it’s a part-time gig at a local cafe, or a few hours’ babysitting each week, or even a paper round, you’re finally earning your own money, Here’s some great tips to help you make...
  15. Apple orchard

    Nearly 600,000 fruit trees later…

    Since February 2008, Fruitful Office has been supplying one tree for every fruit basket that it delivers. The Africa campaign works alongside the charity Ripple Africa, to provide Guava and pawpaw trees in nurseries across Malawi. Deforestation is a serious problem in...
  16. Handcuffs

    Corporate fraud is on the rise, here's how to spot it

    With the UK Government changing the rules surrounding corporate fraud to hold companies themselves liable for crimes committed by their employees, it's clear that fraud is a big problem. In fact fraud in the UK is becoming increasingly sophisticated leaving...
  17. Holt dress

    Painting the town red

    Now King's Road shoppers can enjoy US dress brand ‘Holt – Maison de Luxe’ as Harvest brings the collections to Chelsea and the capital.  HOLT is a luxury brand specialising in hand-painted dresses, brought to life by US designer Elisea...
  18. iPad mini

    Are you addicted to the internet?

    How often do you use the internet? The answer is likely to be a lot more than you realise. In this day and age, absolutely everything can be done online. From research to shopping and paying bills to taking out insurance;...